Being a member of The Skits is by-and-large a good thing, except for one drawback: our mortality rate is 100%. We take all we can get out of you, and when you leave you're nothing more than a hollow meat shell. Here's a list of our alumni, or what's left of them.
Left us in 2016
EMILY COSBAR ('16)
Emily Cosbar majored in Environmental Science and Sustainability. She is irrationally excited by nature and little else. She mildly enjoys graphic design, food, and travel. Check her out in "Video Will."
MICHAEL STOKLOSA ('16)
Michael majored mechanical engineering. He sure can operate the shit out of a lighting system. He will just destroy you in Pokemon. Look at how sexy and confident he is. Check out his performance in "Bombs."
LISA RAZOUMOVA ('16)
Lisa majored in Applied Economics and Management. She enjoys wearing black and white, clean technology, and cracking the occasional poop joke. She may also have a slight gum addiction, but don't confront her about it because she will deny it. Watch her trot the boards in "Fine Silverwear."
ALEX THOMPSON ('16)
Alex majored in Mechanical Engineering. She’s loves rollercoasters and hates heights. She’s also a fan of consistency. See her fighting her worst tendencies in "Basketball School."
Left us in 2015
Christian Dirado-Owens ('15)
Christian is a testament as to why you should stay in school. Aside from listening to his favorite band 'Benny and the Sweet Corns,' he enjoys adventure, cultural diversity, and sharing food. His sketch, "Shorely Boat," was a favorite of the Fall 2014 show, and rewards repeat viewings.
Colin Wentworth ('15)
Colin is the most handsome man in the entire world. Men and women alike swoon upon his approach. However, somewhat ironically, he is also the most lonely. For no one can truly understand him, and sadly -- never will. His sketch, "Tropical Paradise," is still held up as an example of how few jokes really need to be in a sketch. He currently works as a copy-writer at Simply Safe, in Boston.
adam Turkle ('15)
Adam once claimed, "I can't imagine liking comedy more than I already do." By all accounts, this was correct. Adam lived and breathed comedy, and now does improv & stand-up in the DC area while working at Alarm.com. He has a lion's heart and a jester's funny bone. He created "Conservative Monk," which contains "the greatest joke he never wrote."
Left us in 2014
Omar Cancio (grad)
John D. Rockefeller, Floyd Merriweather, Marty McFly…these are people who have never been used to describe Omar. During his time with the Skits, Omar held the unique distinction of being the second oldest and second youngest grad student to ever be a member of the group. His hobbies include wishing for the ability to dunk a basketball, convincing friends that his father is not Omar Little from “The Wire,” and continuing to postpone his purchase of a new PlayStation gaming system. Omar currently lives in St. Louis, but plans to walk 1,000 miles to meet Vanessa Carlton.
Dan Greener ('14)
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Ethan Joseph ('14)
Maybe this is his bio? Maybe he just didn't submit one. I am Ethan. Would not Ethan write that last sentence?
Janelle Colomb ('14)
No bio submitted. She'll pay.
Adam Groner ('14)
A blurb!?!? You want a fucking blurb from me? You’ve got a lot of nerve coming back begging me for this. After everything you put me through? You just had to fill those pixels on you’re precious site, huh? So now you come crawling back pretending that posting some two-bit bio on the internet means anyone even gives a shit about memorializing me. This is low. Even for you. You should be ashamed of yourselves.
Jacob Ritter ('14)
Aww, Janelle's picture on our site is so beautiful.
ABBE SMUL ('14)
Beloved by all.
Left us in the before-times.
Stefan Lawrence hopped a train for New York City, marketed the crap out of a bunch of companies, performed with Elephant Larry in cities all over the country, and now lives in California with his badass wife and two hardy children. He now designs theme parks for a living which ain't a bad way to go. He likes tall ships, tiki drinks and Disneyland.